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Parent-Child Relationships in Germany – German Parenting

Germany is said to be a country of pedantry and order. That’s not exactly true. Germans, just like us, can be late and are just as fond of holidays, but they do not celebrate them in such a big way as we do. Germans are an emotionally reserved nation, but nevertheless, when meeting friends and relatives they can start hugging and kissing. Germans do not like it when their so-called “private area” is violated, so you should not get particularly close to them. Gestures of attention, such as smiling back and holding the door for the person who enters, are common everywhere in Germany.

The special relationship between adult Germans and children. Of course they love them, but there are special traditions here that are unique to Germany.

Adults and children

The daily routine. Germans rise early, with sunrise, and go to bed early, with sunset. The babies are put to bed at 7 p.m., after the children’s program Sandmann (the German equivalent of the Russian program “Goodnight Babies”). Germany does not accept night calls – after 9 p.m. But calls at 7-8 a.m. on weekdays are quite appropriate.

Relationships between parents and children in Germany

School cubbies for first graders. Traditionally, in Germany, parents give their children going to school for the first time a box filled with all kinds of sweets, toys, and other gifts. This tradition originated in the 19th century.

There is a legend that a teacher always left candy on the tree for his students, but over time the tree was cut down and candy, and later the cups began to give parents to their first graders. In this tradition, an important condition must be met – children can open their gift boxes only at home, after returning from school.

Home comfort. Germans love to decorate and create comfort in their homes. Particular attention is paid to children’s rooms. Parents along with kids with a great pleasure to decorate them, and try to do everything with their own hands.

Parenting Model. The model of child-rearing in Germany is peculiar. From birth, children are taught to be independent, that parents have a lot of other things to do besides taking care of them. It is not customary in the country to leave one’s child in the care of grandparents. And if there are no other options, it is considered right and appropriate to thank them with a certain amount of money.

At the age of 14, many children begin to live independently, leaving their parents’ home. At the same time, many parents are not particularly interested in how their children live. In Germany, this is quite normal – after all, from an early age children are taught to be independent, and to depend on their parents from the age of 14 is considered bad form.

You can visit your parents strictly at a certain hour. It is not customary to come later or earlier, otherwise parents may not even let you into the house, and it is not customary to be offended by this either. Despite these “savagery,” family traditions, particularly family holidays, among which Christmas is held in high esteem, are highly valued in Germany.

Financial relations

The Germans are a very economical and calculating people. It is not customary in the country to talk about money, about who earns it, where and how. Children are given some pocket money and taught to save it for necessary, serious purchases.

Germans spend their entire working life saving for their old age and thus, in addition to the pension they receive, have an additional amount of money saved. This amount is often quite substantial, and retirees are happy to spend it on all the things they previously denied themselves – travel, tourism, expensive purchases, etc.

Such are the traditions of Germany!

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